–Opinion-
By Ify Uche
Affinity! Somehow, we tend to walk in twos or threes or fours or any other number at all. When you find a set, it is probable that there is an attractive force that greases the relationship. Affinity is a thing, and it is even stronger in instances where the connector (experience, trait, purpose, or attribute) is one that defines the set or group as minority or privileged.
When you find that you are drawn to an individual or group, it is essential to pause and ask why you gravitate towards them. This interrogation is one you must take seriously because no human connection is to be treated as casual. Interactions and relationships rub off on us in significant ways.
Where there is no affinity, the relationship hangs on nothing and crumbles in the face of the slightest disruption or push. Connectors are that powerful. Building on connectors creates an environment of shared aspiration that fosters belongingness with its attendant commitment and loyalty.
Understanding why you’re attracted to someone or a group is crucial. Analyzing the attractive force to identify its actual impact is equally defining. For instance, an alcoholic identifies with other alcoholics, a person of purpose mingles with other resourceful and focused individuals, or the obese finds comfort among people with the same experience.
Depending on what brings you together, what you consider acceptance or comfort derivable from that affinity may not be beneficial in the long run. If you’re not capable of exercising independent will, a certain togetherness may turn out destructive.
What affinity have you enjoyed so far? Is it one you should sustain? What is its long-term implication? Does it propel you to improve on your experience? Seek out relationships that build you up, support your growth, challenge you to set and achieve positively impactful goals.
