* Deeper Thought Pattern*

By George Ozalla

It is both insensitive and shallow for anyone to respond to an invitation to a night of tribute or memorial by saying, “Stop sending all this; I don’t even know the person.” Words like that reveal not just a lack of empathy but a shrinking of the soul. We live in a world that is fast losing its sense of shared humanity, where people only attach value to what benefits them directly. But life, in its truest meaning, is not built around familiarity; it is anchored on compassion.

The Bible reminds us that it is better to go to the house of mourning than to the house of feasting, for sorrow refines the heart while pleasure often distracts it. In the house of mourning, we are confronted with the essence of life — its brevity, its beauty, the importance of purpose, and when it will be our turn to exit the stage too. Attending a tribute in honour of a deceased, even for someone you never met, can be a quiet seed of destiny; you never know who you might meet there, or what divine connection may unfold. It is often said that; “Some invitations are not about presence, they are about purpose.”

I have often wondered why some people treat social interactions as mere opportunities for pleasure rather than platforms for growth and reflection. The moment they get acquainted with someone who seems successful, the next thing they say is, “Take me out,” or “Let’s go and eat grilled fish or whatever,” or “When will you buy me a drink?” It has become the common language of shallowness. Such behaviour is not just demeaning; it reveals a misplaced sense of value.

I have had numerous opportunities where people offered to take me out or buy me expensive drinks and meals, and I turned them down. I did so not because I despise generosity, but because I understand that respect and dignity often lie in restraint. Stop overrating individuals you meet as “money bags” who must throw money around to prove kindness. Remember that the person you are rating so highly meets many people every day in the course of their profession or other engagements— will the person then be taking everyone out?

I have cause to interact with high-profile individuals, but I look first at what stuff you have upstairs — your mind, your ideas, and your heart — before your pocket. There is nothing wrong in asking people to support your ideas, connect you, buy your products, or stand by your vision, but condescending to ask repeatedly to be taken out, instead of focusing on mutual business or shared purpose, is so demeaning and smacks of someone without vision. By the way, do you ever think of gifting high-profile individuals first? You think they don’t like gifts too? Even if they can afford those things many times over, the gesture sends a message — that you are thoughtful, intentional, and not a mere consumer of goodwill.

It is far more honourable to engage people intellectually to gain enduring insights than to appeal to their pockets. Beg people to patronize your business, fund your idea, or partner in your project — not to buy you a plate of whatever menu or a bottle of drink. That is the posture of a person with vision, not a beggar of indulgence. Do not get me wrong, such treats may happen naturally over time, as relationships grow and mutual respect deepens. But to make that your first layer of engagement when meeting someone new is to build on sand. It weakens the impression you create and diminishes your own worth.

In Accounting, goodwill is greater than money. So it is in life. If someone brings you into a circle where you meet people who can uplift you, you ought to lend credence to that individual. Such introductions are treasures. There are people who, though they may not have the will or the resources to give you money, can show you a path that leads to sustainable success. Value such people. The hand that points you to opportunity is often more valuable than the hand that gives you cash.

Imbibe this very fact, “Never despise the man who teaches you how to fish while others give you a piece.” The wisdom in that saying is timeless. Stop carrying the bandage of frustration around, laced with complaints and lamentations, as though the world owes you something. Everyone you meet is fighting a silent battle. The fact that someone wears a smile does not mean life has spared them its tests. Whatever you think you are passing through, others have endured and still found grace to stand.

Be content. Be full of ideas. Some of the wisest people even resist treats when offered, because they understand that independence of mind is greater than dependence on handouts. Build relationships on mutual value, not instant material expectation. Engage people’s minds first and consider ideas of mutual benefit, not their wallets.

For indeed, man shall not live by bread alone, but by vision, goodwill, and the grace of meaningful connection. Respect yourself, rise above crumbs, and let your worth be seen in the depth of your ideas — not the shallowness of your appetites.

“Better is a little with wisdom than abundance with foolishness.” — Ecclesiastes 7:1

*Publisher & Editor-in-Chief of NEWSCOUNT